But it takes two to tango.

I made the mistake of looking at old pictures.   I had the world by the balls.   But this had to happen.   I never would have seen things in this light if I didn't suffer.   I know I could sit here and be mad at the fact that I had suffered so much, and yet still lost touch with the proper perspective.   But I cant change the past.   I fell once again, and now I have to pick myself back up.   Third time is a charm they say.  The rough thing is I am a guy, and I know I could fix it.   That is what us guys do.  We grab the screwdriver and the hammer and fix things.   And in this case, I am one hundred percent sure that I could make all of this right.   But it takes two to tango. 
I still think that I what I desire in my heart is God's plan.  "May He give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed." - Psalm 20:4.   For this I will have to let go and hope and pray for it.   And if it is not, I will trust what is in store for me.  I will continue to wait faithfully.  I will continue to enjoy my new found view on life.  I know that this had to happen, as painful as this is.   I would have been no good to anyone without going through it.  So I will wait.   Holding out for the fairytale :)